Have you ever felt like your mindset is holding you back from reaching your goals? In this episode, I unpack three powerful mindset shifts to help you stay on track, even when things get tough.
From understanding the trade-offs of saying yes to something new, to embracing success as a habit rather than a moment, these shifts are the key to breaking free from self-sabotage.
Whether you’re aiming for six or seven figures—or simply want to move the needle in your business—this episode is packed with practical insights to keep your mind on your side.
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00:00
Welcome to make more money without selling your soul. The podcast for bold entrepreneurs ready to simplify scale and reclaim their time. I’m Polly Lavarello, Evergreen scaling strategist and cushy business pioneer. Join me and my occasional guests as we explore the themes of wealth, selling and well-being, because building a business that works for you changes everything. Let’s dive in.
00:37
Hello Friends and welcome to the show. Today, we are talking about the mindset shifts that will support you towards your goals, whether they are multi six figures, whether they are seven figures, it doesn’t really matter. The main point is, if you are doing something that is outside of what you already know, if you are doing something that is outside of your comfort zone, then you are going to need to get your brain on board and your body okay, and both of them, if you do not do that, will sabotage you. Your body may do it through migraines and illness. May even, you may even find yourself breaking bones. Your body will be like this is safe, maybe IBS, maybe all sorts of things. I see it. I see it in my five years of supporting clients, I’ve seen all sorts of things. And equally, you know, if your body isn’t doing that, and obviously, that’s nervous system related today, we’re not talking nervous system. We’re talking about the mind. But if your body’s not trying to sabotage you, you may find unhelpful stories creeping up in your mind that are keeping you stuck or sabotaging you. And honestly, the thing I’ve seen across the years of supporting my clients is that there is no denying that you can have the perfect strategy. But if your mind isn’t on board, it is amazing how we will sabotage ourselves, and it is amazing how elegant your brain is, that it can actually find ways to sabotage you without you even realizing that is what it’s doing. Okay?
And there are three really significant things that have enormously helped me keep my brain as an ally, keep my brain aboard. Now I’m going to be really clear. You’ll know if you’ve been listening to this podcast for a while I am by no means a flawless, perfect human being who’s got everything sorted. Not at all bloody well. Wish I did okay. But one thing I will say for myself, and one of the reasons why I really felt the call to share this podcast episode with you, is that one thing people regularly reflect to me is my crazy level of self-awareness. Those of you who are also neurodivergent folk like ADHD or autistic, you will appreciate how self-awareness is almost part and package of that, because you have to be to kind of survive life. But self-awareness is a thing. The other thing is, is that I’ve always been incredibly curious about human beings, human brains, what motivates us and what demotivates us, and so it’s something I pay a lot of attention to. It’s something I read around a lot. Is I am one these people that hoard self-development books. I’m guilty as charged. But I do believe, as you could probably gather from the nature of this podcast, in keeping things simple, one of the things I’ve really made a big effort to do this year is actually read less, because I found actually reading too many self-development books actually didn’t allow any of them to kind of firmly take root, right? And actually, were their own kind of distraction. So instead, I just try and abide by two or three simple philosophies that really helped me stay true to my goals. Because, like I say, you can have the most perfect strategy, but if your mind isn’t on board, it’s not going to happen. It just isn’t. So, while I regularly support my clients with helping them refine their strategy and help them design their strategy, one of the things that actually is almost as if not more important while I’m supporting them is recognizing when they are sabotaging their own success, recognizing when they are telling themselves unhelpful stories that are keeping them stuck. So without further ado, I’m going to be sharing three mindset shifts. It’s funny chat. GPT was like, hacks. I was like, No, Hacks is way too aggressive. Shifts is where we’re at. Okay, so let’s talk about those mindset shifts, and this one is particularly relevant to the beginning of the year. Now this is being recorded in January 2025 and it’s around that time of year when this episode drops, where a lot of people who set really good intentions at the beginning of the year are finding themselves back in old patterns.
05:00
Let’s be honest. Okay, it’s one of the reasons why a lot of my nutritional therapist clients and those kinds of clients are like, Oh, why have I not got an onslaught of new clients coming in at beginning of January? I’m like, it’s the same every January. At the beginning of January, a lot of people think they’ve got their shit together. Where I see the highest number of inquiries is rarely at the very beginning of September, rarely at the very beginning of January, the two kinds of New Years. It’s nearly always towards the end of January, towards the end of September, where people start to recognize, no matter how motivated I was, no matter how much I wanted this, I am struggling to stay on track. I am struggling to maintain that sense of clarity. So without further ado, I’m going to bring you to tip number one, which if you are finding yourself falling off whatever great intention you set for yourself beginning of January, this will be a really helpful reframe, and I’m going to give credit where credit’s due. This mindset shift came from Chris Ducker, who’s long haul leader, event I attended in November, and when he said it, I was like, yes, yes, yes, yes. A really simple concept, but it’s really important. And without further ado, I shall tell you now it is when you say yes to something you are saying no to something else. This bit is so relevant because I so regularly see my clients saying, You know what, I am going to give more attention to LinkedIn this year. I’ve been neglecting it. It is my time to get over there. Then when I check in with them a month later, I’ll be like, so how are you getting on with LinkedIn? Oh, well, you know, I wanted to spend the time to properly optimize my profile, and I haven’t really prioritized it. I haven’t really had the time to do it. So I’ve not done it yet. Or, you know, this year I’m going to get on more stages. Okay, so are you, you know, how’s it going? Have you? Have you written your pitch?
Have you sent that pitch to anyone and beyond the mindset stuff, in regards to, you know, the wobbles we may have, what if they say no, what if I’m rejected, all of that stuff that we already have to deal with, they have a very practical issue in that they decided to add to their plate without recognizing that something needed to move off that plate to create space for it. A really good example of this in my own business and life is that I have just recently hired a social media manager just for Instagram because I had really fallen out of love with the process of posting on social media, and while I enjoy being in my DMs and having conversations over there, one of the things I was recognizing was there are opportunities out there on platforms, let’s say like LinkedIn, prioritizing actually guessing on other people’s podcasts and not just recording my own things that I knew were larger needle movers than my activity on Instagram currently, but while I was still managing my own Instagram content, there wasn’t really much opportunity for me to prioritize and focus on those other things that I knew would have more impact, which made hiring a social media manager such an obvious no brainer, because there was something else I could be focusing on that was going to almost definitely come with a big, solid return. Okay, I’m dropping that in there because I know often when someone’s hiring, they’re like, how do I guarantee it’s going to work? How do I guarantee? And I’m like, be confident about what you’re doing with that time that they’re freeing up with you. When you’re confident about what you’re doing with that, chances are, you know, you’ll be focusing on needle movers, which are going to create more money for you. Okay, so there’s an example. When you say yes to something. My yes was, I’m getting more visible this year, I had to say no to getting in the weeds of creating social media content. Just because I can doesn’t mean I should. Is it my zone of genius? No. Is it my zone of excellence? Yes, I’m good at copywriting. I’m good at creating engaging content, but I was kind of falling out of love with being repetitive, which on social media you kind of need to be. So I got someone in who I really trust to do a great job on my behalf, and I’m so excited for what she’s about chef. So that’s tip number one, don’t get excited about the thing you’re going to do if you’re not equally acknowledging what it is that you’re saying no to at the same time, whether that’s a work task, whether that’s free time, whether that’s a team member, whatever it is, nothing ever good ever comes without some element of sacrifice at the same Time.
So make sure you’re taking that into consideration. Okay? And I’m not saying that in a gloomy way either. By the way, sacrifice doesn’t always have to be super negative, but it’s understanding in the same way. If you want a tree to grow, you’re going to need to prune it, right? So be mindful. Like, don’t just focus on the growth. No, don’t just be throwing growth powder at its roots and wondering why it’s not growing if you’re not willing to prune it occasionally too. Okay. So number two, this is another really big one. People look at success so often in moments, in accolades, in financial months, rather than looking at it as a habit, and again, when we think about.
10:00
Success habits. Again, that also comes back to the number one thing I raised, which is, you know, if you want to say yes to something you’ve got to say no to something else. Now, what do I mean by saying success is more of a habit than a moment when you recognize success looks like, for example, in my case, successfully looks like a three-day working week, where I batch my tasks so efficiently that I have a lot of time and freedom. It looks like being supported by my team. It looks like attracting passive sales because I have my ads running. You know, one of the habits that support my ads running is the fact that I make time to ensure that my funnel and ads are regularly being optimized so that I’m getting as good a return on investment as possible. But what I often say to my mentor, and also what I say to my clients, to be honest with you, is that I like to look at success in my business, like going to the gym. There will be days where I do a pull up. This is not true, by the way. I cannot do a pull up, but there are certain things I can do in the gym where it will feel, I’m not going to say effortless, but it will feel easier. It will feel significant, like, so easy that I’m almost like, wow. Like, how was I not doing this before? This is so easy, and it’s only become easy because of my consistency, because I’ve been regularly doing the thing, because I’ve gone there on days when I didn’t want to go there. The discipline behind regularly going to the gym, even when I’m not seeing results, even when it feels hard, even when you know something about it, is making me feel uncomfortable. But the discipline in knowing that just doing it, regardless that that is the thing that’s going to bring you results, is so powerful. I have to admit, it’s one of the things that really motivates me, particularly this year, to be more consistent with the gym. Because I know going to the gym reminds me of several things. It reminds me I can do hard things. It reminds me that not every day will be easy. And also that discipline I show in being consistent with the gym, the knock on effect it has with my business is phenomenal, too, plus all the physical and mental stuff, right?
Let’s let’s not go into it. But my real important thing that I really want to reinforce with you here is if you only see success week to week, month to month, as something financial or as a particular accolade, you are externalizing your sense of success, which leaves you vulnerable to doubting yourself when you have a bad financial month, doubting yourself when somebody says no, doubting yourself when you Have a launch that doesn’t perform as well as normal, when you recognize that being consistent and doing the thing repeatedly, it’s a rule. It’s a rule of showing up. I think actually, another great to reference, another great person in this industry, Daniel Priestley, shared a great post which I cannot remember all the numbers for, but essentially it was something along the lines of, and please don’t quote me on this. Instead, look at look up the post. But he was sharing how, after seeing the Robbie Williams film, he looked up how many songs Robbie Williams ever recorded, and it’s something like 400 and of those, it was around 400 and of those four, 400 I think only, I can’t remember, but it was a very relatively small percentage, like 11 to 18 became hits. So when you look at Robbie Williams and actually, this is the same story across the board. This was one of my biggest takeaways when I went to atomicon again, nearly every single like really established, successful person that stood on that stage all shared stories of how they showed up again and again and again and failed again and again and again, but they kept on showing up. They kept on persevering towards the same goal. And now we see them, and it looks easy, but oh my goodness, the sweat and the tears and the picking themselves back up that had to happen time and time again for them to get to that stage. So please do not forget that. So many times we look at the polished finished article and think, gosh, they’re making it look easy. I could never be like that. So rarely we see the journey before that. Okay, so please remember that, which brings me actually really nicely to my third point, which is very closely connected. These are all quite nicely closely connected, but which is, don’t let your failures define you. Let them refine you. Oh, yeah. And again, I should credit someone who on my LinkedIn commented this. I was talking about how last year was my refinement era, and this year is my visibility era, as I ensure more and more people learn about what it is that I’ve been creating in this time and make more invitations and just know enough is enough. There is a time when you have to kind of draw a line under a refining and just storm forward. And I’m in that period right now, right but she beautifully reflected, don’t let your failures define you, let them refine you. And it’s very true, and it actually comes back to my previous point, which is seeing success as a habit, not as a moment, but recognize.
15:00
Saying that, you know, where we externalize our success. We are so vulnerable and so similarly, if you look at a failure as something that defines you as a human being, ie, I am a failure. I don’t even like saying those words out loud, because it’s reinforcing something which I know isn’t true, but I say the same to my friend if you’re listening, and yes, you could be anyone right now. And I’m saying that because nobody on this planet is a failure, because you’re here, because you’re listening to this episode right now, because you’re showing up for yourself right now in a way that other people aren’t okay. So you are not a failure. But the things that will reinforce our belief that we are a failure is pinning our worth to things outside of us. So to summarize, what have I just shared? I have shared that when you say yes to something, you are saying no to something else. So every time you desire more of something, recognize what you need to say no to to make that happen, do not imagine it’s just going to land on your lap, that you’re going to close your eyes, manifest it and it’s there. That’s not how life works, honey. I wish it did. Secondly, stop seeing success as a moment. Stop seeing it as an accolade. Stop seeing it as an award. Stop seeing it as a financial month. Stop seeing it as a financial year, and recognize that true success is how you feel, and the thing that creates the feelings is your habits. Okay, when you start looking at your success in your business, like going to the gym, like, you know what, sometimes I actually feel immense pride, where I’m like, oh my goodness, this week has been so quiet, like it has not been as busy. There haven’t been the same sales. But you know what, I have shown up regardless. I have shown up, optimistic, positive regardless, I’ve still reached out, I’ve still served people, and I trust in the longer term thing that I’m building here, that if it’s not happening now, it will happen tomorrow. And the beauty of the world we work in is that very often that is the case, but if we allow our brains to take over the steering wheels, and we start to assume there is something wrong with us. We will not show up with the same energy, we will not serve with so much generosity, we will not listen with the same depth our intuition. Will just take a vacation, and we will not see the obvious opportunities right in front of us. In fact, we can even sabotage opportunities when they’re when they’re in front of us, because our self esteem has taken such a kicking. Okay? You are not your results. You are already worthy and finally, very closely connected to number two. Do not let failure define you. Let failure refine you. Use failure as the fuel. That’s hard to say failure as a fuel to refine what you are doing, refine what you are focusing on, refine your offers, refine your message, refine your visibility. Strategy. Fabulous. Well, if you’ve listened to all of this and thought that is all a gorgeous Polly, but I’m lacking the clarity around what I should be doing, you know, I’ve now got my mind on board, but I’m still not really sure what to be focusing on. Then do download my guide in the show notes. It will give you clarity over how to map out q1 q2 and beyond, so that you can have your best year in business yet. That is what I wish for you. And there we have it. If you found this episode helpful, please do share it. Please do tag me when you do. And if you haven’t already, please leave a review under the show. It really does mean so much to me, and next week, I will be back in your ears with another guest talking about lead generation, which is a topic I’m very excited about, and you should be too, because if you want more sales, you 100% need more leads.
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