00:00

Welcome to Make More Money without Selling Your Soul with me Polly Lavarello, evergreen marketing expert. This podcast is for you if you are an online entrepreneur who is looking to simplify their business to scale.  On this podcast you can expect to hear regular talk about wealth, about selling and about wellbeing. Because I believe these three core fundamental things are pivotal to your growth moving forward.

00:44

Hello and welcome to make more money without selling your soul with myself Polly Lavarello, evergreen marketing expert and cushy business pioneer.

And today I’m talking about five mindset tools that will support you to sell more, because selling isn’t just about following strategies, if it were, then a lot of us would have significantly more money. And what’s interesting is that time and time again, occasionally, I will get distracted by a new strategy. And I’ll pay attention to it and perhaps get a little bit excited. Because deep down I think the majority of us in the online business space, we get into doing the work we do because we get immense joy and pleasure from supporting others we love using our tools and expertise and experience to help people essentially have better lives because of it regardless as to whether it’s because they’ve got a better business, or because they’re better and their well being we didn’t get into it because we love pitching people. There are people out there don’t get me wrong who love, love, love, love selling. But the majority of us don’t. And I will include myself in that I really, really do. This is why a lot of the work I do is very much based on attraction marketing, about building relationships with people about being very visible, so people can find me easily. Because I’m allergic to hard selling, I won’t do it myself, I won’t be on the receiving end of it either. And it’s certainly not what I support my clients do either. In fact, I tend to attract clients who are very aligned to my view when it comes to selling.

However, you don’t have a business without sales. And what’s really heartbreaking is that the majority of businesses that fold is down to a lack of sales. And it is is heartbreaking. And ultimately, most of those businesses had strategies probably bonafide strategies to make sales, they’re probably using strategies it’s seen other businesses successfully use. And really, like I say, most of the time, the lack of sales isn’t necessarily down to the strategy that they’ve chosen, and more likely to do with their mindset. And so I really wanted to speak to this. It’s slightly uncomfortable, of course, because I don’t want anyone to feel remotely gaslit or triggered by me sharing that fact. But mindset definitely plays a very significant role in our comfort levels around selling in our desire to get out there and pitch and how we hold conversations when we get in person with someone and we’re pitching a one to one offer.

So I wanted to share with you the five tools that I’ve leaned into in my time. I think it’s also important to mention the neurodiversity piece here because even though I have not been diagnosed, being autistic already comes with its own social awkwardness, but then thrown into ADHD and the sensitivity to rejection. I think anyone who’s got ADHD, in fact, I’m borderline want to say I’m sure anyone who’s got ADHD probably has an even harder time with this and others because we have this very strong, almost somatic reaction to rejection. So those mindset tools come in even more handy than they would perhaps for others. So I really, really wanted to speak to this because ultimately, when we can reframe our relationship with selling, when we can feel excited about selling, when we can feel good about selling when we can see selling as an act of service, it’ll become significantly easier. And you may be listening to this going. Yeah, I’ve heard that phrase selling being an act of service. But it’s one thing to say that it’s another thing to feel that I hear you friend, I’ve been there too. Okay, so let me share five little tips, maybe five little reframes to help you think about your relationship with selling and how you can feel better about it. So number one, isn’t exactly a mindset. Well, it is a mindset thing is having a goal, okay? And I say this because occasionally people will come to me and they’ll say things like, oh my gosh, I have not sold for the last two, three weeks. I had a really good month last month, but this month, it just feels like everybody has disappeared. Is My Business about to tank. I mean, what’s interesting, right is you’re hearing this and you’re probably thinking, yes, I’ve had that thought and oh my gosh, now I hear that from another person’s perspective.

Of course their business isn’t about to tank. You know, we all have those little periods occasionally particularly early on in business where We may have a dry spell. I’ve never seen a dry spell proof business, there usually is some kind of dry spell, even if their dry spell is still relatively lucrative compared to what yours is, peaks and troughs. It just happens. The world is an unpredictable place right now, there’s been all sorts of things going on wars, inflation. I mean, it keeps on common pandemic’s. So there’s been a lot of things which can create a little bit of upheaval, depending on the industry you’re in. For some people, it may seem like they’re getting loads of success for others not. But the really important thing is, we mustn’t let all those things be an excuse to not have a goal to just be like, oh, I’ll just get by. Or if I could just make one sale, then I’ll be really happy with that. No, we need to have a goal. So that’s my first tip, I always have a kind of bottom line, this would be all right, this would be okay, this would be amazing number. And what’s important about having that goal is it then enables you to look at your week or quarter or year ahead and map out what is genuinely realistic for you. I guess it’s like with all things, whether it’s looking at your finances, whether it’s looking at how many sales you want to make the closer connected you are to all of these things, the higher the likelihood of you achieving them. If you say, Oh, I’d love to make 10k. But I’m not sure how, and I’m just gonna go back to writing that social media posts I was writing, or you sit down and go, I really want to make 10k Over the next 10 days, what offers do I have? And how many of them do I need to sell, okay, so I need to sell 10 of my 1k offer, or I need to sell two or three of my one to one, or I need to sell 20 of this, okay, what’s the most realistic, probably the one to one. Okay, so my focus for the next two weeks is going to be all about one to one, all my invitations to work with me are going to be solely based on my one to one and look at the difference it makes in your business over those next two weeks. So particularly for your cash poor, this is honestly the approach I take or even if you’re just looking for a little revenue injection, whatever it is, look at it that way.

Because then you can actually create the strategy that aligns to where you want to be. And that in itself will give you a feeling of certainty that in itself will enable you to start visualising you succeeding, which in and of itself will also put you in a place of probably feeling more positive, more grounded. And you’ve got a team in a really good position to also say to them, right this is it 10k 10 days, 3121 places, what are we going to do team? Like, where am I going to be visible? How many lives me doing, what the invitations? What’s the funnel? Let’s do this. Be proactive and assertive about what it is you want as a final result, and definitely leave room for surprise, leave room for overspill, because we love that too. And tip number two, it’s not about you, you need to remove your ego from this process. And I say this in the context of where I’ve supported clients in the past, and they’ve come to me having been at the other side of big fluctuation in their business, or perhaps a drop in sales, it’s really disheartening to look at how their shoulders can slump, the face can fall, the language around that offering their webinar, whatever it is, it can be really unhelpful. Because as you can imagine, the more we focus on the things that aren’t working, the more we see that it’s like you’re being pulled in some muddy bog, and you’re getting deeper and deeper into it or like sinking sand, the more you kind of focus on the sinking sand, the less you actually see the opportunity like the vine that’s hanging over your head that you could quickly hold on to and swing out.

But instead you’re just looking down at the sand that’s sucking you in. Just know. Because the other important piece is Do you feel any more valuable? When you’re making really good sales? Do you feel any better about yourself? Do you suddenly feel like hey, I’m, I’m incredible. No. So why do we make it mean so much about us when we’re making less money. And I share this because it’s so so common. Anytime I raise it with any client, it can see that almost sense of shame around it as well. And again, that’s an unhelpful emotion. There’s no reason to feel any shame if you feel the very human response. Because ultimately, the thing about being a personal brand is is you you’ve created your offers, you’ve created those relationships with your following with your subscriber list that can feel deeply personal. But if we allow ourselves to fall into that victim mode, we will not see the opportunities available to us we will not have that resiliency, to get back up take on the valuable feedback as to why things haven’t been working as we’d like them to, to then be able to be proactive about leaning into what can work for us right now. And so it can really create a really long intense period of nothingness working this, which is unhelpful. And the most important thing is like I say, you’re worthy already, regardless of what sales you’re making, and this is why I like to have things like my ukulele lessons. This is why I find going to the gym and doing weights and stuff. I find it really valuable because it also reminds me of the importance of consistency the importance of just showing up and doing the thing and that sometimes it will fail like you’re doing it all for nothing. And then the next week Sunday getting getting getting it all comes flying in.

And to really not allow it to mean too much to instead pat myself on the back for showing up and doing the thing. And trusting it, if I do it enough times, I will get to the end result. So it’s really similar with selling, sometimes you will see no results. And I know there’s an old thing about how to get 10 nose before you get to the Yes, but there’s a lot of truth in that it’s the same with sales calls in the very early stages of starting a business. So many people will kind of share oh my gosh, I didn’t close every sales call, of course, you’re not going to close every sales call. Again, it means nothing about you. Yes, you might be able to improve your sales practice somewhat and help people feel really heard and help people feel really trusting of you and the support you’re going to give. But ultimately, most of the time, I know when I’ve gotten a sales call with someone who’s really ready to work with me, it hasn’t really mattered very much what I’ve said on that call, it’s been more about us connecting and giving them the opportunity to share what it is that they want to do. And for me to reflect that, yes, I’m ready and excited to support them with that. And it’s generally been as simple as that. And those clients have also been the very best to work with, because they’re the self led clients who are just excited to take action who’ve probably been snooping around listening to my podcasts, consuming my content and feeling ready to go. So it’s not about you. And like I say a practical tip that you can take from this is, please find some kind of hobby that you do purely for the joy, whether it’s as simple as me and my ukulele, whether it’s going for a swim or do something that you can feel some kind of sense of pride in and joy and happiness that has nothing to do with work because you are more than the work you do. And when we are self employed, it’s very easy to heavily identify with our work and that can actually be quite yucky. Number three, one of my best mindset tips celebrating this is something that a lovely Tamsin Crimmins really, really brought home for me in the year that I was working with her every time I spoke to her, the first thing we talked about is, what was I celebrating. And it was really powerful to think of everything from big to small from like, oh, I actually managed to get up and not hit the snooze button this week. And I managed to meditate for 15 minutes. And I’m really celebrating that because I wasn’t doing that last week. And so that feels awesome.

And I’m celebrating that I haven’t made a sale this week. But I had five sales calls and three people are about to get back to me. And I’m really excited about all of them, like whatever it was, but just kind of like lean into various different things really, really, really powerful. Again, it’s what you focus on expands, right. So when you’re ready to celebrate anything big or small, it just means that we bring in so much more of it. And we just are vibrating from that energy of receiving, which is totally beautiful. So yeah, don’t forget to do that. Number four, be open to learning and be open about learning. This comprises pretty much everything from feedback from people who are inside your programs, feedback from people who’ve done your courses, feedback from people who’ve been on a sales call with you to kind of understand how they found it and if they found it helpful and deliver. But the better you understand your existing clients as well as your potential clients, the sooner you will make sales. I actually shared a Post this morning on Instagram, I said, rather than focusing so much on trying to help people understand you spend more time demonstrating how you understand your ideal client, when we focus more on showing how we understand our ideal client or want to understand our ideal client better and support them better. Again, the sooner the sales come in, have really really noticed this recently that the coaches that I really pay attention to are the ones who kind of say, I’m experimenting with this new way of doing things, I’m aware of this problem.

And I know I have this solution. And I’ve got the framework that’s going to help you get from here to here, if you are this particular kind of person, I’m only doing five spaces because it’s brand new, but let’s do this. And that’s an exciting and fresh energy that I’m very attracted to. And it shows that ear to the ground that every business owner should have their ear to the ground to really caring about creating something that’s going to be really measurable to your ideal client. People aren’t paying any more to be in a coach’s energy, they are paying for a solution. And clients are way more discerning these days, particularly if they’ve been in this space a while. And so being really specific about how you’re going to help someone is really, really helpful. And part of that is the vulnerability piece of being open about learning. Because I think sometimes we have this whole assumption that because we’re not a corporate business, but we’ve been around corporate businesses that we need to have that solidness that kind of brick house, everything is done and dusted come in and everything is complete. And actually, the most successful marketers out there don’t operate like that at all. They’re constantly tweaking and refining, and finding an even better way to deliver an even better experience to their clients.

And that’s why those clients become repeat clients. And that’s why those clients will bang the drum about how awesome it is working with that particular coach. And that’s why they’ll be constantly enrolling new clients because they’re excited to that energy. So don’t feel like when you share that you’re learning stuff that it comes across as a weakness or a vulnerability or makes you less than an actually it really opens the doors to open Frank, honest conversations, either with existing clients or potential clients. And that in itself is incredibly powerful. You don’t have to have all your eyes dotted and your T’s crossed. And in my experience where I’ve worked with coaches, I actually found that the worst experience because they weren’t open to learning from working with me, the dynamic was only within the extent of how I would learn from working with them. And that just wasn’t a fun energy. The coaches who I’ve worked with, since you’ve been in an energy of like I’m learning and come along land with me, too, that’s been exciting, because obviously, I wouldn’t be there in the first place if they didn’t already have enough that they’re bringing to the table. But I was excited by what it was that they were learning alongside that.

And finally, just recognise that selling is essentially about building relationships with people. And those relationships won’t always immediately result in sales, it might be that that person goes on to recommend you to somebody else, it might be that that client that’s knocking on your door, in a year’s time, in three months time in six weeks time, perhaps never. But the more relationships we have, the bigger our network, the sooner we’ll start to see regular sales. To be honest, it also makes it way more enjoyable. It just changes the dynamic of the conversation. Like I say, it almost goes back to point four, about being really open about learning. When you come in with the energy of I want to learn about you, I want to learn about where you’re stuck, I want to learn about where you want to be. And I want to really honestly tell you whether this is something I can help you with or not. That is a really beautiful energy to bring to sales calls. That’s the energy I come to sales calls. It’s kind of like a diagnostic. It’s a triage where I find out about exactly where our clients at where they want to be. And if I don’t have that particular toolkit to help them get there, I’ll refer them on to someone else. And I’m honest about that. And there’s really nothing wrong with that. And again, it’s recognising that when you’re creating these new relationships, even if they don’t end up being your client, the ripple effect can be astounding. So there we have it. There are my five tips one have a goal to it’s not about you remove ego from this, three celebrate the wins small and big. Four, be open to learning about learning and five, focus on building relationships. There you have it my lovelies, I hope that was valuable to you. Next week, I’m gonna be talking about how cold showers have helped me to be a better business owner and everything else nervous system regulation. Really looking forward to it. If you enjoyed this week’s episode, please please share it. I want to make sure that everyone out there is equipped to go out there and make sales and run successful businesses because lord knows the world needs more independent, financially successful small business owners. We’re a special bunch and like I say we deserve to be successful. So there we have it. I will be in your ears next week. And yeah, please share